You thought that in your absence, it would cause me to break.
But I'm not a careful person, and I was already broken before your opinions became relevant.
I dared to ask a question, and you excused yourself from answering.
You are like a feather being thrown into the air in front of me, and you lingered there for months.
I didn't have time to rest in those months because I wanted you to stay afloat.
I kept you flying so high that you flew to Uranus and Saturn and Venus, and you told me the stars were golden just for me..
but they weren't and your words came water falling down and I wanted to catch them all in a jar, but the jar was cracked and your words spilled out and were taunting me from the puddles they made on the ground.
If you were to take an x-ray of my brain, you would see a zipper up the middle of it that I placed there last November because I had to learn how to take care of myself and also how to let people in.

And maybe I would let people in using my heart, but my brain doesn't mix up heartbreak and a real break.
So if there's some things I could have told myself earlier they would be as follows:

1. Never will there be a Harry Potter to save the day.
2. Ice cream does not fill cracks, but it stops tears.
3. Learn to not say yes to everything, and especially do not say yes to your heart when it tells you to miss someone.
4. Don't hesitate to kick a hole in the wall because one day they'll come crashing down anyway.